Top 10 Reasons Rafael Nadal Would Retire from a Match

Read Rafael Nadal’s autobiography and you’ll discover a man with a collection of compulsive rituals, a nervous disposition, and a varied collection of phobias. Watch him in practice and you’ll see a man who fusses over every tiny detail and discomfort. Listen to his press conferences, and you’ll hear him often describe himself as a man falling apart at the seams. Then follow his matches, where 95% of the time he rips his opponent to shreds.

While Rafa’s life exists somewhere in between very real physical challenges and random injuries that are perhaps not as dire as he makes them seem, one never knows when all the ailments and angst might prevent him from playing. So here they are:

The Top 10 Reasons Rafael Nadal Would Retire from a Match

10. I smelled fish and I got queasy again. (That’s just Mardy–Dude, take a shower!)

9. I misinterpreted Uncle Toni’s hand signal to serve out wide and thought he wanted me to leave the court. I am in trouble now.

8. Somebody told me Eva is the umpire, and I heard she is ugly on the inside.

7. Roger just aimed a drop shot to knock over my water bottles. Qué putada!

6. The waitress at Chili’s handed me my steaming platter of fajitas and…well. You know the rest.

5. I sat on a chair wrong.

4. My new knee is on back order and doesn’t come in until Friday.

3. Is that thunder? Why are there so many birds? Did I just hear a dog barking? I think someone in Row 2 is eating a ham sandwich. I must go.

2. Cristiano asked me to dinner.

And, the number one reason why Rafael Nadal would retire from a match?

1. It’s my knee. No, my knee is fine. It’s my shoulder. No that’s not bothering me at all, I am playing at 100%. I have just lost passion for the game. Don’t be ridiculous, I love it out here. It really is my knee. Wait…did Roger go out early? No? Never mind, I play.

~

P.S. Thanks to Genny_SS for Spanish language assistance. 🙂

You might also be interested in:

Top 10 Reasons Novak Djokovic Would Retire from a Match

Top 10 Reasons Roger Federer Would Retire from a Match

PHOTOS: c2012, 2011 Rafael Nadal, posted on his Facebook page.